Why I’ve Been MIA Lately

750x857 triangles on black Never since the creation of TRANSITIONS in 2007 have I gone so long without writing anything! I’ve tried a few times to write something in February, but with the current Ascension symptoms I’m going through now, it’s nearly impossible to do anything — especially if physically moving and turning one’s head and/or eyes the slightest bit is required! I’ve tried to push my way through this and just do the work and other things I need to do but there’s a price to pay when I do this and it sends me back to bed to recover from that stupid move, on top of the symptoms I was having. Lesson learned, but I’m not always so great at resting and doing nothing physically when I’d rather be doing something else. I like to rest when I like to rest, not when I’m forced to. Hum, another personal lesson.

The point of this short note is just to let everyone know I’m still here and okay despite this round of intense Ascension “Recalibration” (see Lisa Renee’s February 2013 article about this) symptoms I’ve been going through so far in 2013. I can and have worked and written articles and books while dealing with different Ascension symptoms and other related issues etc., but, when the spinning head business happens I absolutely cannot push my way through that symptom at all! The room/house/reality starts turning counterclockwise and the more I push my body to do physical things, chores, write etc., the faster the spinning. And of course this makes me nauseous which means I’m not doing anything at that point but crawling into bed and hopefully falling asleep (exiting my physical body) for as long as possible. Doing this always seems to help with the spinning head business and related nausea… for a while.

So this is what’s going on for me now along with other Ascension symptoms too. Here’s a short rundown of them because I know some of you reading this are going through this now too:

  • Ascension flu-like body aches and pains, chills
  • Inner cold flashes that radiates out just like “hot flashes” do
  • Parts of body internally and externally feel bruised and sore like I fell or was hit etc.
  • Parts of head and skull internally and externally feel bruised and sore like I was hit or hit my head on something etc.
  • Sudden nausea immediately followed by my heart/heart area hurting and feeling like a “muscle spasm” for a few seconds then it’s all gone
  • Head, skull, eyes, spine pains and pressures
  • Blurry vision again, dry sore eyes
  • My hair looks and feels like corpse hair again
  • Inner body thermostat in flux again. Inner cold flashes followed by inner hot flashes which build up skin sensitivities
  • Since 1-1-13 constant ringing in my ears — “ascension tinnitus”
  • Bouts of diarrhea (again) due to purging lower frequencies/density etc.
  • Sense of smell terribly amplified, smelling cooked food smells for DAYS to the point that it starts to make me nauseous… and pissed!
  • “Time” is present and then not, then back again, then not again. Increased difficulty with linear awareness, passage of linear “time”, day, date etc.
  • Actual dreaming (not daydreaming) while fully awake and doing other physical things
  • Increase of anomalies again. Walking into a room in my house and seeing something very different there instead of what’s normally there.
  • Increased awareness of positive higher-dimensional Beings nearby observing me/us, and them waiting for the next phase to begin with us

As usual I’ve most likely forgotten a bunch of other symptoms but we’ll chalk that up to brain fog and the spinning head business! And of course February has been and will continue to be an abnormally busy month for me with lots of extra things that must be done this month. This morning I thought I could run up to the store to pick up a prescription for my Mom because I was feeling better. So off I dashed, only to discover that I wasn’t really “better” at all and needed to walk, turn, move very carefully or I kept tipping slightly and bumping into things in the store. And the head pain and pressure arrived in the store with a blast because I was outside my house and it’s always harder to function out there than it is in my higher vibrating house. So I got the prescription, but learned that I’m still in this latest phase and must take it ease for a while longer like it or not.

I’ll write more when I’m able to not tip over or barf while typing! Are we having fun yet fellow ascenders? Group Hug.

grouphug

Denise

February 18, 2013

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Those Miserable Karmic People

Thank you Beth/Balsamicmoon for suggesting this topic. I appreciate when people do this as it helps me focus on specific things important to them at the time.

We’ve all experienced this at least once in our lives. I’ve experienced it many times with many people throughout my life. It is that thing where suddenly you’re having to deal with and/or interact with a stranger who you immediately and intensely HATE. Of course they usually aren’t too fond of you either, but your profound repulsion and hatred of this stranger is beyond anything you’ve felt in your life, and it has you scratching your head in-between thoughts of assault or murder! These situations where so much deep and intense emotion boils over immediately—with a stranger—are usually past life situations. I’m going to refrain from using the word karma or karmic only because it has, in my opinion, been horribly distorted and misunderstood by so many people. Karma does not mean “bad” or “guilty” or “indebted”, it simply means something is as yet unresolved within you. Don’t worry about the other guy—this situation is for you.  It’s a gift from your Higher Self who wants you to use it so you can become truly integrated and free.

But because we don’t usually want to feel the hate and rage, deal with the anger and frustrations, our first thought is to flee the scene or to shut it all down and to not feel. To run away, to hide, to do everything we can to NOT feel or deal with that we’re feeling because it is soooo nasty and dark. Because I’ve repeatedly and thoroughly wallowed in Nasty and Dark in this life, I’ve learned a thing or two about how this spiritual lesson works. (Much of this is in my new book that is coming soon now…I promise.) What I have learned is that when repulsion comes knocking at your door—in whatever form it decided to use this time around—and it doesn’t really matter if it is or isn’t connected to one or more of your “past” lives, it is there screaming in your face and throwing turds at you to force YOU to deal with something within yourself. I know, I know. It seems like the situation is all about the shit-slinging monster or evil demented human making your sweet life a fucking nightmare all the sudden. You’ve got to discern this one for all you’re worth, and that’s not easy while under such intense fear/anger/hatred/attacks etc., but you’ve got to do it nonetheless. Get your butt back into the calm Eye of the Storm as quickly as you can and do your internal investigations from there.

Every monster/evil demented human whose ever appeared in my life were there as great and almost sacred teachers for ME. They were and are Initiations. They were there to force me to look within myself for the answers and not only at their obnoxious and repulsive selves. I’ve learned that when something, someone, or a group of someones suddenly are triggering multiple lower emotions within you for whatever the reason/reasons, then use that energy to transmute things within yourself. Turn your focus away from the monster/evil demented human, and to yourself instead and do honest internal investigating. Why do you feel the way you do? Why do you hate them? Why does he/she get under your skin so easily? Why do you want to cause them pain? Why do you feel weak or defenseless against them? Why does he/she have all the power when he/she is a cruel asshole? These are your tools to get free of them and to simply get free. Don’t focus so on them as the triggers. Focus on how they make you feel and honestly figure out why and what needs to be changed within you now. You see, this is Source manifesting a riddle before you so that you can do some more inner housecleaning and resolve some more polarity within yourself. Never forget that the monsters are gifts pushing you to get free.

Denise

October 26, 2009

copyright silverCopyright © Denise Le Fay 2009-2012. All Rights Reserved. You may copy and redistribute this material so long as you do not alter it in any way, the content remains complete, credit is given to the author and you include this copyright notice and link. https://deniselefay.wordpress.com/