Certain Starseed/Wanderer Contracts

blue soul comets

“So many things seem to be happening. I will just describe a few. I have had this extreme awareness and knowing of all the “negative” aspects in my personality, in my being that need to be worked on. All that yucky dark stuff that usually make me cringe and want to hide. My usual reaction to the moments when i am digging deep, I mean deep inside myself, where most of us do not want to go, is to stop thinking about it, to dig my head in the sand because I have always struggled with self-worth. I have always felt like I was not good enough. I have almost been trained to hate myself. And to think about the “dark aspects” always made me depressed and loath myself. made me feel like a piece of shit if you will. I have always struggled with anxiety and depression. (raised in an extremely religious southern baptist household which I feel I could write a whole book on the ass backwardness of organized religion but I digress)

The other lifelong struggle has been the negative attacks from the dark humans. At school, in the work place, even friends have been down right nasty in the past. A best friend of mine who for almost 10 years we were together almost everyday (who is one of us she just does not know it yet) has witnessed and has been just as perplexed as I as to why I so frequently get attacked by people, usually male. In my life it made me feel as though something was inherently wrong with me. Even though I have always known I have a big heart and have so much love to give and that I was here for a purpose. I love like crazy. I don’t have a mean bone in my body yet I sometimes am treated like dirt by people. My spirit guides have shown me recently that all the attacks, anxiety, depression, physical and sexual abuse have been Team Dark trying to derail me. Their plan was to keep me so consumed with fear and confusion over what was “wrong” with me and what I did to deserve all the awful things done to me. I am very sensitive and am an empath so living in this world with these people and energies has been freaking awful. Well those little fuckers may have won that battle but they sure as heck are not winning the war! On some level for quite some time it worked for a long time but no more! I have spent the last 30 years trying to figure out what was wrong with me. Why did I feel so different. Why did I feel like an alien on this planet? So now when facing these dark aspects of myself there has been a major shift. In the last few days instead of hating myself I shine the dark corners with love and forgiveness. And boy does it feel good…

faye1234″

Because faye1234’s Comment question was so important and one that most Starseeds/Wanderers/Lightworkers can completely relate to, I wanted to respond to it in an article instead of getting buried in Comments. Thank you faye1234.   ❤

EVERY STARSEED’S FIRST THOUGHT TYPICALLY IS: “IT MUST JUST BE ME, RIGHT?”

Because my natal Sun is in Capricorn and in Capricorn’s natural 10th House, for decades I believed that my downright insane and miserable patriarchal encounters, head-butting fights, and those epic David vs. Goliath type battles with patriarchal persons in positions of power and/or authority were solely due to my Capricorn 10th House Sun… and a lot of it was. In addition, my natal Saturn—ruler of my Capricorn Sun—is in Libra (along with three other planets including the ruler of my ASC) and this Libra stellium only amplified my always feeling at odds with the “normal” patriarchal masses and what to me have always been their negative and seriously crazy belief systems, ways and actions.

These lifelong tensions and squirmy feelings I’ve always had (remember my age) were tremendously amplified whenever I had to interact with (typically) older males in positions of “power” and “authority” in our society; bosses, police, judges, lawyers, doctors etc. (After the 1960s revolutionary battles with “the establishment”, certain females were allowed to publicly wield more patriarchal power too and they became power-hungry, ego-based, left-brained imbalanced patriarchal humans we Starseeds/Wanderers/Lightworkers/Indigos also had to navigate. There were no equal rights for women, there was join the patriarchal Boys Club because that’s all that existed. I’ll spare you my numerous unpleasant and oftentimes insane and ridiculous battles, attacks and showdowns I’ve experienced with the patriarchy during my sixty years on Earth and get into the WHY of it. Natal placements plus this second ingredient are intimately connected and why I’ve repeatedly experienced extreme negative battles and attacks from so many humans—mostly males but plenty of patriarchal entrenched females too—physically manifesting Team Dark’s alien agendas in this dimension and world.

This other energetic ingredient is being a Starseed. A Starseed with a Soul Mission and hardwired ability to transmute, integrate, resolve and transcend density, duality and negativity and return those energies to a higher frequency state of energetic neutrality or “unity” while in physicality. Needless to say this is not an easy, safe or pleasant job to do while within a negative polarized physical world reality, and most Starseeds (and “Volunteers”, Forerunners, Wayshowers, Pathpavers etc.) with this particular Soul Mission and ability (“Polarity Integrator” as Lisa Renee has called them) have had more than our fair share of negative, cruel and outrageous attacks and battles with the physical human patriarchy.

So yes, the answer to our first thought that it must be me is correct, but for different reasons than you and I believed for far too long. It is just me, just you, just us, because we Starseeds/Forerunners/Wayshowers are here now doing what we’re so good at doing with and to polarized (Duality) energies. The real difficulty has always been that most Starseeds/Forerunners/Wayshowers typically don’t consciously remember that they “Volunteered” to incarnate on physical Earth now and why. A rare handful do remember from childhood that they intentionally came to Earth from elsewhere, whereas far more begin remembering later in adulthood. Other Starseeds, and even some Indigos, are triggered by their Higher Selves to begin consciously remembering their larger and more complex identity and Soul Mission(s) at specific times due to a multitude of personal, astrological, cosmic, multidimensional and evolutionary Ascension Process reasons.

But before a Starseed begins consciously remembering their greater identities and/or current physical plane Soul Mission, they typically believe the negative lies and BS that all the negativity, hostility, disrespect, violence, physical and etheric attacks, endless supply of abnormally imbalanced humans littering their earthly lifelong Path are somehow all their fault! They typically and automatically wonder what terrible thing(s) THEY must have done somewhere to create the constant negativity, darkness and cruel attacks from other humans during this lifetime. If you’ve bought into the “sin” and “guilt” or “karma” beliefs because you don’t remember your greater identity and Soul Contracts yet, then you assume that must be the reason for the endless negativity you attract from both living humans plus other-dimensional Beings, Aliens, Entities etc.

You, me, each of us typically runs these negative experiences through our own ego filters and naturally assume it is us, when in fact it is us, but it is only because we’re on Earth now to transmute and transcend the negativity in 3D and 4D primarily and NOT BECAUSE WE’VE DONE ANYTHING WRONG. My dearest fellow Starseeds/Forerunners/Wayshowers/Indigos, we naturally and automatically attract the negativity, insanity and imbalanced seen and unseen populations because we carry more Light here and the Dark instantly sees and recognizes us long before we ever recognize them! That unfortunate truth is simply part of our many different learning curves we must Master while here in 3D. We take plenty of beatings before we put two-and-two together, but once we finally do connect the inter-dimensional energy dots of our larger existence, identity and Soul Missions, we then move through our individual Soul Missions much easier, faster and with far less personal damages and wounds than before.

The farther along we individually go with transmuting polarized energies through our bodies and beings, the more we remember and embody High Heart or Unity or Triality Consciousness which makes our Work, our “jobs”, our Soul Missions here much easier, faster, less painful and polarized. We learn to reach and maintain emotional neutrality which is also greater and higher conscious awareness neutrality, with more and more things, people, situations, events, attacks and all the rest of it. We’re learning or have learned and mastered being and remaining within that third higher frequency space that exists vibrationally beyond (let’s say above for ease of communication) Duality which means we have an easier time NOT being affected or influenced by any physical human, nonphysical Being/Alien/Entity, or trans-dimensional events caused by either of them whether directed at us individually or not. It just is what it is and we simply do what we do with less and less drama, pain, negativity and time spent in those miserable battles and attacks. From my Denise perspective it took me far too long to reach the edges of this state of being and working of my earthly Soul Mission but there it is and what do I know about it all anyway?  😉

REMEMBER THE PRINCESS & THE PEA SYNDROME?

Starseeds/Indigos/Lightworkers are typically ultra-sensitives who FEEL things, people, events, locations, actions, thoughts, thought-forms, emotional energies, negativity, polarity etc. much more intensely than “normal” people do. Added to this is something I’ve become increasingly aware of over the past intense thirteen Ascension years (1999–2012) which is that the more polarized and dark or negative energies I’ve gotten rid of (transmuted and therefore removed), the less of it it now takes to make me feel like ultra crap! Hence, the Princess & the Pea business. This is another reason why our own inner dark, unresolved issues and energies—PLUS everyone else’s—feels so much larger and exaggerated to us than it actually is. The more Light there is, the more it highlights the Dark no matter how small it may now be. Don’t take it personally, don’t go into guilt over it, don’t obsess or fixate on it, remain emotionally neutral about it all and just do what you’ve been doing all along which is integrate it, transmute it, and transcend it back into unified Neutrality.

When we feel the dark or negative now it’s painful in new ways because it’s so profoundly amplified and highlighted by the abundant Light Energies now present. The dark thing only needs to be something small and simple now and yet it feels like a massive boulder under my twenty mattresses! “Consciousness” is rapidly becoming a whole-body and whole-being awareness instead of the old left brained linear only thought process of polarized 3D. We are rapidly becoming increasingly aware of more things but in very new ways which means we’re having to let go of even more and learn many new ways of perception during these last six months of 2012.

“WHY DID I FEEL LIKE AN ALIEN ON THIS PLANET?” 

Because you are one dearest. ❤ Most of us Starseeds/Wanderers/Lightworkers are the positive ETs many people talk about that they believe will come to Earth and fix things! Surprise, but we’re already here and have been for decades, working behind the scenes, doing what we do for humanity and the Ascension timeline. I know that huge self-worth issues are common among the Groups or Waves of Starseeds/Wanderers (and Indigos) but you’ve all got to realize that you’re not here on Earth now to be like the human masses. Not remotely, so don’t use those negative and distorted Alien patriarchal human standards to measure yourself against for any reason. I know how hard and painful that is too but you’ve got to ignore those mind control delusions and distortions and be what you are and do what you do. And I know so many of you have done it repeatedly even when you didn’t know you were.

Denise

July 10, 2012

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Completely Creating Above the Old Lower Consciousness Box

I’ve never been so happy to reach the spring Equinox as I have with this 2010 one! The time since the 2009 winter solstice has been difficult and often felt like being stuck in quicksand much of the time. After the needed winter months of isolation, hibernation and introspection, I was certainly ready for the spring energies to arrive…and I love winter! The energies increased over the last couple weeks of winter and yet, all that pushing Aries spring energy to create anew, and it still isn’t happening. Here’s one huge reason why I feel—so many are not yet ready or able to perceive far enough outside the old lower 3D reality box.

I recently read a sentence or two by Steve Rother mentioning that the group had let him know about things they will soon be talking about (channelings) that have to do with our (Lightworkers) screwed up beliefs and attitudes about “abundance”. I could not agree more and can’t wait for other Lightworkers besides me to remind fellow Lightworkers about abundance outside of 3D and lower consciousness. We’ve forgotten natural and honest higher abundance, multidimensional non-linear creating, ease and real freedom and I understand why. But, to best create the new higher (5D) world we must get back in touch with abundance awareness and energy for self and all others and fast.

I recently stumbled upon a well-known persons new article/message to fellow “Lightworkers”. I’ve seen this persons name before but this was the first, and it’ll be the last time I read anything by them. To me so much of the information was exactly the same type of ridiculous, extremely limited and downright foolish crap that too many people like this keep writing to inform and guide their many readers with. Obviously, information like this is shocking to me and makes me frustrated and disappointed. I honestly thought we Lightworkers/First Wavers/Second Wavers/Wayshowers etc. were so far beyond this level of consciousness—and many of us are—that I’m always shocked when I encounter supposed “higher information” like this. No retirement for me quite yet because these are the sorts of asinine things that light a fire under my old First Waver backside and get me back on-track again after too much time stuck in the quicksand, hoping for the best. I should know better. Stair-steps remember? Many, many Ascension Stair-steps because we’re NOT all standing on the same one at the same time.

stairstep people2What’s got me frustrated and disappointed is information like this that suggests Lightworkers around the planet get together in meditation to create things for our new fifth dimensional world. Sounds great so far right? The suggestion is made that we shouldn’t wait for those lower vibrating, lower consciousness people to change and grow a heart and higher consciousness (BTW, that’s what Phase One and then “My Lightworker Strike” which was followed by the Sept. 9, 2009 separation of worlds was all about), but that those of us with “higher consciousness” need to create “new monetary systems”. WTF? Are you kidding me? Global Lightworkers who should—in Phase Two of the ascension process—work together to create a fifth dimensional (5D) world reality with a totally new monetary system!? Like I’ve said before, I haven’t gone through everything I have as a First Wave Lightworker up to this moment just so that I and everyone else could find the perfect mate, the perfect dog, the perfect vehicle or the perfect new higher 5D global monetary system! FUCK, I’d cry if I wasn’t so pissed off. Evidently, from their current ascension stair-step many cannot yet perceive above and beyond the old lower consciousness patriarchal money-based systems of 3D. Taking the greed and corruption out of lower frequency planetary control systems is not remotely enough for this old First Wave Lightworker.

SOME REALLY ASININE EXAMPLES

1) Brand new 5D global monetary systems where there is no greed or corruption but plenty of money for all. See how much better this way is?

2) Brand new 5D global wars/fighting but  no one is killed. See how much better this way is?

3) Brand new 5D world where everyone is still told what to do by government leaders, but because Lightworkers have sent Light and Love into their hearts they will led the people with Love. See how much better this way is?

4) Brand new 5D world where taxes are equal for everyone around the planet. See how much better this way is?

OMFG.          

 

SOME OUTSIDE THE OLD LOWER PATRIARCHAL CONSCIOUSNESS BOX EXAMPLES

1) No fucking money at all because we Lightworkers, Wayshowers, Pathpavers etc. CAN perceive well beyond the old lower 3D world reality and its limited systems and know a truly higher and better way can and will manifest in the new 5D earth that we are creating.

2) No fucking wars anywhere because we have ascended/evolved had our DNA/brains/hearts/beings evolved beyond that level of polarized insanity

3) No fucking governments or country or world leaders because everyone’s DNA has been evolved and each person is integrated and unified within themselves and their High Hearts actually work finally.

4) No fucking taxes because we decided that we do not want to create even a 5D world where any form of money or taxes or anything like it needs to exist because WE have evolved well beyond money and money consciousness.

Why is outside-the-box higher awareness, perception and imagining so damned difficult for so many of these well-known so-called “new age” authors, lecturers and online writers to get this about the evolutionary Ascension Process? I’ll tell you exactly why — because they cannot perceive anything higher as yet themselves.

Do you honestly believe that we are evolving, ascending, having our entire bodies, brains, hearts and full DNA evolved tremendously just so we can recreate a slightly better version of the old lower frequency 3D patriarchal world within a higher 5D world and consciousness? Do you honestly think and believe that is what this planetary, cosmic and universal ascension and compressed evolution is really all about? Us Lightworkers banding together in global meditations so we can create a non-greedy monetary system for our new 5D world? I know very well it is not.

Back to abundance and our painfully obvious continued disconnect from it.

The 2010 spring Equinox hammered me with the fact that I STILL need to let go of many old and very familiar habits and beliefs within myself and my body now. For me to continue ascending/evolving/expanding consciously and energetically, I must continue releasing any and all aspects, thoughts, belief systems, old lower expectations and familiar habits that were created when I existed within lower polarized 3D earth reality. They simply do not fit or work for this higher frequency version of me now existing within Phase Two with ongoing expanding consciousness. So you see, we ALL still have our bits and pieces of old familiar but limiting silly shit n’ crap n’ beliefs that we need to keep tossing overboard so we stay floating at the higher level we now exist within. This ascension process will continue for each one of us, no matter how wise sounding or popular or well-known any of us are, because we are living this Process in bodies and repeatedly need to let go of even further old lower frequencies and consciousness aspects of ourselves.  I’m talking about ALL of us Lightworkers/First Wavers/Second Wavers/Wayshower etc.

Because we’ve spent so much time living within lower polarized physical 3D earth reality, we’ve forgotten what higher abundance is like. We came from it, but because we’ve been living within polarized 3D Insanity Land for so long, we’ve become consciously disconnected from natural higher abundance. Our Phase Two ascensions will continue pushing us into this level or dimension and expanded quantum consciousness where abundance exists and is so much easier for us to see and feel and be ourselves. That means we ALL are currently having to let go of and cast-off more of our old habitual lower frequency ideas about how the new higher 5D world can be. What sounds like a truly great idea for the new earth reality  today will be ridiculous to us next month, even more so three months from today, and repulsively unacceptable and infantile six months from today and so on. That is how fast our consciousness and DNA is currently evolving within Phase Two.

I’ve said before that if you consciously remember Mother Lemuria, or if you feel in your Highest Heart what original Lemuria was like, or what your nonphysical stellar, other-dimensional Home station is like then please, oh please I beg of you to use THAT as a blueprint or starting point within your ascending High Heart Consciousness to consciously create and co-create the new 5D earth world reality.

I’m not saying to replicate original Lemuria or our nonphysical stellar or Light level Homes on our new 5D earth, but that we can and will create much higher than that now. It’s a done deal already at higher levels, but we here in our physical bodies going through all this ascension business as Lightworkers/Wayshowers/First and Second Wavers are living out and implementing what other aspects of us have already planned and created at even higher nonphysical levels. But this is how WE do it; we do it at and within multiple dimensions, multiple levels of awareness and being, within multiple dimensions all at the same time. WE can’t mess this one up really so you see even my rant article here is not necessary.  😉

If our DNA is reconnecting—which it is—then you know that we cannot fully comprehend today what we’ll be like or able to consciously perceive, remember, feel or access tomorrow or next month or next year right? So, my point is to imagine, desire, and dream so very much higher, so very much greater and more grand than merely recreating an improved 5D money-based world where that money (and anything else for that matter) is shared equally with  all people! Our growth and ascension isn’t over yet and we are coming close now to having major DNA re-connections activated which will instantly cause us and our consciousness to make further quantum leaps forward that today are hard for us to comprehend. Because of this, I ask all of you to at least consider that we can and should create/co-create our new 5D earth world from a VASTLY higher Heart stance than money or anything else remotely like it from lower 3D lives and consciousness. This too is another learning for these incarnate aspects of us actually here living the ascension process as Starseeds/Lightworkers/Wayshowers on the planet in physical bodies. How completely can you cast-off and let go of the lower vibrating past systems, beliefs, consciousness and awareness and get really free to perceive much higher during the spring quarter of 2010?

Denise

March 21, 2010

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