Late May 2013 Update

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I found this recently and wanted to share it — it’s by Carl Gustav Jung:

“There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” 

Isn’t that the truth! And by god don’t we know it now from having lived it for these many Ascension months and years.

Polarity or Duality resolution does not happen by denying that the Dark exists (or has existed and has done so at unseen levels of frequency in other dimensions etc.). It disappears from one’s self, one’s environment, one’s space and one’s focus once one has discovered it and acknowledged that it even exists, then begins to work on integrating it, transmuting it, taking all the nasty, punch, sting and power out of it and return “it” back to a natural state of pure energy or energetic neutrality. Remember Carlos Castaneda’s teacher Don Juan teaching him about ‘Petty Tyrants’ ? That’s what all this level of personal and collective and other dimensional inner Dark stuff is; varying levels of developed ‘Petty Tyrants’.

The “Darkness/Negativity” can be some old emotional wound any of us received (or gave) that we haven’t as yet dealt with and so, it grows in power over the years or decades or lives, increasingly demanding that we finally see it, dealt with it, and eventually transmute that wee tiny inner Petty Tyrant. Or it can be a larger, more well-developed chunk of personal inner stuff and junk that we haven’t dealt with yet. Or, it can be much larger, more well-developed energetic situation(s) in a family member(s) or other loved ones or friends or neighbors or co-workers etc. and it’s actually their stuff and junk but it’s partly your problem too because of the multiple leveled connections. Or, it could be a big honkin’ huge external being like a negative Reptilian or Draconian or demon or numerous other nonphysical beings and/or entities. Doesn’t matter really — they’re all just ‘Petty Tyrants’ of varying levels of development and potency and at this point does it even matter if it’s “yours” or not? It doesn’t matter to me and hasn’t for the past difficult but highly transformative and empowering fourteen Ascension years. It’s either a baby Petty Tyrant, or a mid-sized Petty Tyrant, or a full-blown, giant-sized monster from the freakin’ astral pit of hell Petty Tyrant, but in the end it’s all just unresolved stuff and junk that’s gotta go if one truly wants to continue evolving and utilizing these potent cosmic and galactic energies to do exactly that.

Moving right along…

So here we all are, halfway through the glorious extension period called the Nine Months — from 12-21-12 Winter Solstice and Great Expiration Date, through to the September 2013 Equinox. How many personal and/or bloodline and/or other people’s and/or other dimensional ‘Petty Tyrants’ have you transmuted just since 12-21-12? For those of us (Ascension-related Lightworkers) who excel at transmuting the collective septic tank stuff and junk for humanity in general, it’s been fairly interesting since 12-21-12. All kinds of homeless, displaced and very hungry astral critters floating around looking for either an escape route away from all this LIGHT or some lower frequency human to latch on to again to use parasitically to feed off energetically. And on top of all this continuing multidimensional shifting around business, we’ve been incrementally embodying increasing amounts of our higher frequency Selves into these physical bodies and personalities and awareness. I want to say something either brilliant or funny right here but I’m just as stunned by all this high magnificence and lowly misery and BS as the rest of you! Whatever… let’s just keep moving forward my friends and fellow Ascension journey-ers.

I sense the coming start of the Third Trimester — beginning on the June 2013 Solstice and running through to the September 2013 Equinox — will bring in with it some more very important “tools” for each of us in this amazing Process. Tools such as further embodying, which naturally gives us more and more Higher Awareness of things and from multiple perspectives or as I’ve called this in the past, Spherical Consciousness or Awareness. Or tools such as increased clairvoyance and other higher awareness tools of perception. And/or tools such as slipping out of linear time more and more until it feels “normal” to you. Or any number of other exciting new tools of perception and being. Due to those Stair Steps, which of these new “tools” you receive or have been receiving depends upon which Stair Step your currently on. What you’re experiencing and aware of today won’t be the same next week or next month because you are evolving and changing that quickly now so expect new and different tools to continue coming to you as you progress up those energy and consciousness Stair Steps.

Because it’s been a while since I last wrote anything, I wanted to let everyone know that I’m still around and breathing, haven’t been thrown in jail for anything, am not existing on Pluto,  nor have I died! It’s just been really hard for me for multiple reasons since April 1st, 2013 (which I’ll explain about more in another article) but as of May 16th, 2013, the higher Energies have anchored into this physical dimension (in a very positive way I mean) and there are lots of great things unfolding that are just out of sight for a while longer but will be fully visible within this dimension very soon now. Promise.

Denise

May 20, 2013

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Certain Starseed/Wanderer Contracts

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“So many things seem to be happening. I will just describe a few. I have had this extreme awareness and knowing of all the “negative” aspects in my personality, in my being that need to be worked on. All that yucky dark stuff that usually make me cringe and want to hide. My usual reaction to the moments when i am digging deep, I mean deep inside myself, where most of us do not want to go, is to stop thinking about it, to dig my head in the sand because I have always struggled with self-worth. I have always felt like I was not good enough. I have almost been trained to hate myself. And to think about the “dark aspects” always made me depressed and loath myself. made me feel like a piece of shit if you will. I have always struggled with anxiety and depression. (raised in an extremely religious southern baptist household which I feel I could write a whole book on the ass backwardness of organized religion but I digress)

The other lifelong struggle has been the negative attacks from the dark humans. At school, in the work place, even friends have been down right nasty in the past. A best friend of mine who for almost 10 years we were together almost everyday (who is one of us she just does not know it yet) has witnessed and has been just as perplexed as I as to why I so frequently get attacked by people, usually male. In my life it made me feel as though something was inherently wrong with me. Even though I have always known I have a big heart and have so much love to give and that I was here for a purpose. I love like crazy. I don’t have a mean bone in my body yet I sometimes am treated like dirt by people. My spirit guides have shown me recently that all the attacks, anxiety, depression, physical and sexual abuse have been Team Dark trying to derail me. Their plan was to keep me so consumed with fear and confusion over what was “wrong” with me and what I did to deserve all the awful things done to me. I am very sensitive and am an empath so living in this world with these people and energies has been freaking awful. Well those little fuckers may have won that battle but they sure as heck are not winning the war! On some level for quite some time it worked for a long time but no more! I have spent the last 30 years trying to figure out what was wrong with me. Why did I feel so different. Why did I feel like an alien on this planet? So now when facing these dark aspects of myself there has been a major shift. In the last few days instead of hating myself I shine the dark corners with love and forgiveness. And boy does it feel good…

faye1234″

Because faye1234’s Comment question was so important and one that most Starseeds/Wanderers/Lightworkers can completely relate to, I wanted to respond to it in an article instead of getting buried in Comments. Thank you faye1234.   ❤

EVERY STARSEED’S FIRST THOUGHT TYPICALLY IS: “IT MUST JUST BE ME, RIGHT?”

Because my natal Sun is in Capricorn and in Capricorn’s natural 10th House, for decades I believed that my downright insane and miserable patriarchal encounters, head-butting fights, and those epic David vs. Goliath type battles with patriarchal persons in positions of power and/or authority were solely due to my Capricorn 10th House Sun… and a lot of it was. In addition, my natal Saturn—ruler of my Capricorn Sun—is in Libra (along with three other planets including the ruler of my ASC) and this Libra stellium only amplified my always feeling at odds with the “normal” patriarchal masses and what to me have always been their negative and seriously crazy belief systems, ways and actions.

These lifelong tensions and squirmy feelings I’ve always had (remember my age) were tremendously amplified whenever I had to interact with (typically) older males in positions of “power” and “authority” in our society; bosses, police, judges, lawyers, doctors etc. (After the 1960s revolutionary battles with “the establishment”, certain females were allowed to publicly wield more patriarchal power too and they became power-hungry, ego-based, left-brained imbalanced patriarchal humans we Starseeds/Wanderers/Lightworkers/Indigos also had to navigate. There were no equal rights for women, there was join the patriarchal Boys Club because that’s all that existed. I’ll spare you my numerous unpleasant and oftentimes insane and ridiculous battles, attacks and showdowns I’ve experienced with the patriarchy during my sixty years on Earth and get into the WHY of it. Natal placements plus this second ingredient are intimately connected and why I’ve repeatedly experienced extreme negative battles and attacks from so many humans—mostly males but plenty of patriarchal entrenched females too—physically manifesting Team Dark’s alien agendas in this dimension and world.

This other energetic ingredient is being a Starseed. A Starseed with a Soul Mission and hardwired ability to transmute, integrate, resolve and transcend density, duality and negativity and return those energies to a higher frequency state of energetic neutrality or “unity” while in physicality. Needless to say this is not an easy, safe or pleasant job to do while within a negative polarized physical world reality, and most Starseeds (and “Volunteers”, Forerunners, Wayshowers, Pathpavers etc.) with this particular Soul Mission and ability (“Polarity Integrator” as Lisa Renee has called them) have had more than our fair share of negative, cruel and outrageous attacks and battles with the physical human patriarchy.

So yes, the answer to our first thought that it must be me is correct, but for different reasons than you and I believed for far too long. It is just me, just you, just us, because we Starseeds/Forerunners/Wayshowers are here now doing what we’re so good at doing with and to polarized (Duality) energies. The real difficulty has always been that most Starseeds/Forerunners/Wayshowers typically don’t consciously remember that they “Volunteered” to incarnate on physical Earth now and why. A rare handful do remember from childhood that they intentionally came to Earth from elsewhere, whereas far more begin remembering later in adulthood. Other Starseeds, and even some Indigos, are triggered by their Higher Selves to begin consciously remembering their larger and more complex identity and Soul Mission(s) at specific times due to a multitude of personal, astrological, cosmic, multidimensional and evolutionary Ascension Process reasons.

But before a Starseed begins consciously remembering their greater identities and/or current physical plane Soul Mission, they typically believe the negative lies and BS that all the negativity, hostility, disrespect, violence, physical and etheric attacks, endless supply of abnormally imbalanced humans littering their earthly lifelong Path are somehow all their fault! They typically and automatically wonder what terrible thing(s) THEY must have done somewhere to create the constant negativity, darkness and cruel attacks from other humans during this lifetime. If you’ve bought into the “sin” and “guilt” or “karma” beliefs because you don’t remember your greater identity and Soul Contracts yet, then you assume that must be the reason for the endless negativity you attract from both living humans plus other-dimensional Beings, Aliens, Entities etc.

You, me, each of us typically runs these negative experiences through our own ego filters and naturally assume it is us, when in fact it is us, but it is only because we’re on Earth now to transmute and transcend the negativity in 3D and 4D primarily and NOT BECAUSE WE’VE DONE ANYTHING WRONG. My dearest fellow Starseeds/Forerunners/Wayshowers/Indigos, we naturally and automatically attract the negativity, insanity and imbalanced seen and unseen populations because we carry more Light here and the Dark instantly sees and recognizes us long before we ever recognize them! That unfortunate truth is simply part of our many different learning curves we must Master while here in 3D. We take plenty of beatings before we put two-and-two together, but once we finally do connect the inter-dimensional energy dots of our larger existence, identity and Soul Missions, we then move through our individual Soul Missions much easier, faster and with far less personal damages and wounds than before.

The farther along we individually go with transmuting polarized energies through our bodies and beings, the more we remember and embody High Heart or Unity or Triality Consciousness which makes our Work, our “jobs”, our Soul Missions here much easier, faster, less painful and polarized. We learn to reach and maintain emotional neutrality which is also greater and higher conscious awareness neutrality, with more and more things, people, situations, events, attacks and all the rest of it. We’re learning or have learned and mastered being and remaining within that third higher frequency space that exists vibrationally beyond (let’s say above for ease of communication) Duality which means we have an easier time NOT being affected or influenced by any physical human, nonphysical Being/Alien/Entity, or trans-dimensional events caused by either of them whether directed at us individually or not. It just is what it is and we simply do what we do with less and less drama, pain, negativity and time spent in those miserable battles and attacks. From my Denise perspective it took me far too long to reach the edges of this state of being and working of my earthly Soul Mission but there it is and what do I know about it all anyway?  😉

REMEMBER THE PRINCESS & THE PEA SYNDROME?

Starseeds/Indigos/Lightworkers are typically ultra-sensitives who FEEL things, people, events, locations, actions, thoughts, thought-forms, emotional energies, negativity, polarity etc. much more intensely than “normal” people do. Added to this is something I’ve become increasingly aware of over the past intense thirteen Ascension years (1999–2012) which is that the more polarized and dark or negative energies I’ve gotten rid of (transmuted and therefore removed), the less of it it now takes to make me feel like ultra crap! Hence, the Princess & the Pea business. This is another reason why our own inner dark, unresolved issues and energies—PLUS everyone else’s—feels so much larger and exaggerated to us than it actually is. The more Light there is, the more it highlights the Dark no matter how small it may now be. Don’t take it personally, don’t go into guilt over it, don’t obsess or fixate on it, remain emotionally neutral about it all and just do what you’ve been doing all along which is integrate it, transmute it, and transcend it back into unified Neutrality.

When we feel the dark or negative now it’s painful in new ways because it’s so profoundly amplified and highlighted by the abundant Light Energies now present. The dark thing only needs to be something small and simple now and yet it feels like a massive boulder under my twenty mattresses! “Consciousness” is rapidly becoming a whole-body and whole-being awareness instead of the old left brained linear only thought process of polarized 3D. We are rapidly becoming increasingly aware of more things but in very new ways which means we’re having to let go of even more and learn many new ways of perception during these last six months of 2012.

“WHY DID I FEEL LIKE AN ALIEN ON THIS PLANET?” 

Because you are one dearest. ❤ Most of us Starseeds/Wanderers/Lightworkers are the positive ETs many people talk about that they believe will come to Earth and fix things! Surprise, but we’re already here and have been for decades, working behind the scenes, doing what we do for humanity and the Ascension timeline. I know that huge self-worth issues are common among the Groups or Waves of Starseeds/Wanderers (and Indigos) but you’ve all got to realize that you’re not here on Earth now to be like the human masses. Not remotely, so don’t use those negative and distorted Alien patriarchal human standards to measure yourself against for any reason. I know how hard and painful that is too but you’ve got to ignore those mind control delusions and distortions and be what you are and do what you do. And I know so many of you have done it repeatedly even when you didn’t know you were.

Denise

July 10, 2012

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2011 & 2012 & Beyond

For a few months before the 11-11-11 portal I’d been sensing some partial and half-understood impressions about it multidimensionally. Months ago these 11-11-11 impressions seemed ass-backwards and mildly strange to me so I decided to wait until I was able to perceive this information a bit better before I mentioned them publicly. In all honesty, this particular information is still a bit strange sounding even to me and that should tell you something about it! But first, let’s backtrack a few years for clarity and perspective because then 2012 and 2013 will be a bit easier to perceive. As you look at the number images below, be very aware that there are THREE of them in each sequential Stair Step and this has to do with our evolving out of the TWO of lower frequency, lower consciousness 3D duality, and into the THREE of unity (triality) or High Heart consciousness and being.

The September 9, 2009 09-09-09 portal was about the ending of an intense Ascension phase with huge overtones of death and/or dying required to reach the next frequency level or Stair Step.

The October 10, 2010 10-10-10 portal was about our individually preparing to physically embody a good bit more of our Higher Selves in our current bodies, personalities, and being.

The November 11, 2011 11-11-11 portal was about our first global 5D Group Conscious C0-Creating event in the New Evolutionary Cycle of Unity because we’re free of the old Evolutionary Cycle/Mayan calendar and duality. However, as many of us unexpectedly discovered, for us to pass through the 11-11-11 Initiatic portal we first HAD to consciously be aware of, transmute and integrate ANY remaining lower frequency emotional tidbit we may still have had within ourselves first.

After continuously doing personal inner transformational Polarity Resolution work since February 1999 (the start of the Mayan calendar Eighth Wave), I assumed I had the majority of my inner junk already transmuted, and I did, except for another small past life speed-bump issue with my Mom. [See Post October 28th & 11-11-11 Adventures] To make sure I didn’t miss this particular emotional tidbit I still contained on the morning of 11-11-11, the Dark Ones personally hand delivered the message to me via activating my Mom so that she’d trigger this old issue in me so I’d feel and see it. How helpfully thorough of them. No I’m serious, the Dark Ones did me a favor with this one even though I wasn’t feelin’ the luv towards them that day at all! All I felt the morning and day of 11-11-11 was that the Dark Ones had stolen and derailed 11-11-11 for me and Mom, but because I’m stubborn and know better, I worked through that immature and incorrect lower emotional take on their actions and transmuted my past life speed-bump that the Dark Ones made sure I would not miss. They are professionals at what they do after all…  😉

To pass through the 11-11-11 Initiation portal many of us unexpectedly found ourselves depressed and/or ready to quit. I’ve never encountered any of the previous number portals having this effect on me, my Mom, or anyone else but the 11-11-11 portal did and this told me it was an extra important portal of change for us individually and as a Group in the New 5D Unity Cycle.

I know I’ve only perceived the outer edges of this complex multidimensional topic about the 11-11-11 portal, 2012, and the 12-12-12 portal, but I expect to perceive more about this topic and how it’s effecting us and other-dimensions Beings over the coming weeks and months. Please understand that everything is very different now that we’ve completed and exited the old Mayan calendar/Evolutionary Cycle. I’ve been adjusting, adapting and embodying like crazy since October 28, 2011 and it’s profoundly exhausting and at times painful to the point of having to remain in bed. I haven’t been able to write nearly as much as I always have due to the intense transmuting and embodying that’s been happening non-stop. I know many of you won’t want to hear this next bit, but, many of us Starseeds will be doing massive amounts of embodying to this degree throughout 2012. Sorry, don’t hate the messenger.

For most of 2011 I kept perceiving and clairvoyantly seeing the 11-11-11 portal as very Goddess-like in its energy. I don’t mean total Goddess but one aspect of the Goddess seemed to be intimately involved with whatever happened multidimensionally on 11-11-11. Now here’s the seemingly ass-backwards part that’s been confusing to me over the months. I kept sensing the Dark Ones connected to the 11-11-11 portal and this one aspect of the Goddess energies but in a highly positive and perfect way. After some time I’ve been able to perceive that—and this makes total sense once you get your bearings on the other side of the end of the Mayan calendar/Evolutionary Cycle—it’s also Graduation or Retirement Time for the Dark Ones and Light Ones and the missions and roles each Group has held in place (embodied) for the rest of us during the past Evolutionary Cycle in duality.

I’ve known that these other Beings—both Light and Dark and everything else—cannot evolve or change jobs or roles until WE had completed what WE in physicality needed to here. Once WE’D completed that, which we have on October 28, 2011, then all the other multidimensional players, aspects and participants can and will also transition into the next Evolutionary Cycle, whatever and wherever that is for each one of us. Until then however, we’ve all been obligated and pretty much trapped in our polarized roles and missions throughout this past Evolutionary Cycle and this includes the Dark Ones as well as the Light Ones.

Evidently the 11-11-11 portal was where many important things began for all of us, including the Beings we’ve known in the past as the Dark Ones. Throughout 2011 increasing numbers of the Dark Ones finally understood what’s happening, what’s changing and why, and slowly began relinquishing their old roles and moved on. However as is still obvious, some of the non-physical, non-human Dark Ones are still clinging, hanging on and fighting, not realizing that their mission has ended because the October 28, 2011 Expiration Date has been reached and it’s time for everyone to move on to the next Evolutionary Cycle and learning. I sense this final completion phase will unfold very quickly throughout 2012 no matter who or what resists this multidimensional Evolutionary Process.

I’ve been sensing that 2012 and the 12-12-12 portal will be for the non-physical, other dimensional Team Light players what 2011 and the 11-11-11 portal was for the non-physical, other dimensional Team Dark players. If I’m correct with what I’ve been perceiving so far about this unfolding completing/beginning, then the 12-12-12 portal of December 12, 2012 will be the cut-off date for Team Light to connect with an aspect of  God-like energies (this is the X shape multidimensional crossover symbol I’ve been seeing) and evolve into their New roles. To my awareness today, this feels like the aspects that we call “God/Goddess” are integrating their fragmented, polarized parts back into themselves and evolving into something new also. Stair Steps, always stair steps with the entire Ascension Process.

Once we complete 2012 we’ll be energetically ready to enter the new Evolutionary Cycle fully. This new unity cycle exists beyond the old system of 12 and duality. The easiest way to describe this higher system of 13 is to use the old system of 12. In it the 12 apostles represented humanity within 3D physicality and linear time, while Jesus represented the 13 and a quantum connection with Source. Once we’ve completed all the Stair Steps coming throughout 2012, then Earth/humanity enters the conjunction alignment with the Super Galactic Center’s incomprehensible energies and then we’ll begin the new cycle that’s like 13 with its conscious connection to Source and Higher Self.

Denise

November 26, 2011

Copyright © Denise Le Fay & TRANSITIONS 2011. All Rights Reserved. You may share this article so long as you don’t alter it in any way, and the content remains complete, credit is given to the author and this URL https://deniselefay.blog and Copyright Notice is included.